Man considers leaving wife after discovering shocking 20-year secret

Written by Henrik Rothen

Sep.30 - 2023 7:53 AM CET

What he sees makes him leave immediately.

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A man is devastated after learning a secret that has been kept from him for two decades. Now, he is contemplating leaving his wife.

Secrets in a marriage rarely lead to anything positive. On the contrary, they can destroy a marriage if one partner discovers the truth independently.

When you've been married for over 20 years, the last thing you expect is to find out that your partner has been harboring a shocking secret all this time. Most people have a clear expectation that they know everything about their spouse.

An unnamed man has now revealed that he discovered a secret about his wife, a secret that not only she but also his own family had kept from him for a long time. This has left him feeling violated, and he is now considering leaving her.

According to Mirror, it wasn't even his wife who revealed the secret. Instead, it was his sister-in-law who had to tell him that she had dated his brother many years ago.

Apparently, they had met several times and had even become intimate. This happened just a few weeks before he started dating the woman he has now been married to for over 20 years. Yet, he knew nothing about it.

He has since realized that his entire family was aware of this secret. This has led him to admit that he feels violated by it and wants to cut off contact with all of them.

He revealed all this in a post on the Reddit forum, where he also sought advice.

"My wife and I have been married for over 20 years. My brother's wife, my sister-in-law, recently revealed at a family dinner that my brother had dated my wife a few weeks before we started dating. I never knew," he wrote.

"They kept it a secret all these years. I realize it's ancient history, but we've had our marital issues like any couple over the years. I feel pain, violation, and almost irrational anger that this 'secret' was well-known in my family, but I knew nothing. I don't know how physical it was, but my sister-in-law's implication was that they were intimate."

"My wife and I are already sleeping separately. I'm considering ending it with her because of this. I've been a fool for half my life to everyone close to me. I feel like they're all jerks. From my parents (who said they thought I knew) to my siblings—they all knew. I don't want to have contact with them (at least for a while)."

He also said that he chose to confront his brother, who admitted they had been together. He also explained that he regretted not saying anything about it.

His brother also told him that he had just informed his own wife, who was also upset to hear it. But that's precisely why she chose to pass on the news to the devastated man.

In the comment section, numerous users have responded to the post, and the majority write that it's certainly not unreasonable to be upset.

"Very humiliating. You have to decide whether you can try to work through this with these people," one person wrote.

"The whole family was disrespectful to you and made you feel like a fool. Don't let them try to minimize your feelings," another commented.

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