You Should Never Say These 16 Things to Someone with ADHD

“You seem totally normal.”
That might sound harmless – but to someone with ADHD, it can feel like a punch in the gut.
ADHD isn’t always visible, but it’s always real. Show understanding, not judgment.

What is ADHD?

• ADHD stands for Attention Deficit Hyperactivity Disorder
• A neuropsychiatric condition that begins in childhood and often continues into adulthood

Treatment and Support

• Medication can be part of the treatment
• Cognitive training and coaching can help with daily routines
• Psychological support improves emotional management

Common Misconceptions

• Many mistakenly believe ADHD isn’t a real diagnosis
• A lot of comments are based on myths, not facts
• This can lead to stigma and frustration

Next slide: what not to say to someone with ADHD.

“ADHD isn’t even real”

• Denying the diagnosis invalidates the person’s experience
• It takes away their right to be taken seriously

“Everyone gets distracted sometimes”

• True – but ADHD is a fundamental brain disorder
• It’s not the same as ordinary forgetfulness

“You don’t seem like someone with ADHD”

• Many people learn to mask their symptoms
• That doesn’t mean their struggles are gone

“You just need to pull yourself together”

• ADHD isn’t about laziness
• It involves difficulties with executive function

“Only kids have ADHD”

• It used to be believed ADHD went away with age
• Newer research shows many adults are still affected

“You’re just lazy”

• ADHD has nothing to do with intelligence or work ethic
• It’s about how the brain processes tasks and stimuli

“You could focus if you really wanted to”

• Motivation works differently with ADHD
• It’s not about willpower – it’s about neurology

“You’re not even trying”

• Many people with ADHD try extremely hard – it’s just not always visible
• Comments like this can be especially hurtful

“But you can play video games for hours”

• Fast-rewarding activities affect the brain differently
• That doesn’t mean someone can control their attention at will

“You forgot already?”

• Forgetfulness is a core symptom of ADHD
• It’s not about carelessness – it’s neurological

“Have you tried making a list?”

• Structure and planning are often major challenges
• Even well-meaning advice can feel patronizing if it misses the mark

“Don’t tell people you have ADHD”

• Suggesting secrecy can create shame and guilt
• It’s up to the individual whether to share their diagnosis

“It’s not that bad”

• Minimizing ADHD worsens feelings of being misunderstood
• It can affect everything from work life to self-esteem

“You don’t need extra time – just work faster”

• Extra time isn’t special treatment – it’s essential
• Tasks can require more mental effort for someone with ADHD

“You’re always overreacting”

• Emotional sensitivity is common with ADHD
• Small things can feel huge – and deserve compassion

“You just want attention”

• People with ADHD aren’t trying to be disruptive
• Their behavior often reflects internal chaos – not manipulation